Sometimes I feel wordless.
I don’t have anything to say.
I can’t express what I’m really thinking. These swirling words in my head stubbornly refuse to be made into sentences.
I want to write, but what if I lead people astray? What if my “wisdom” isn’t really wise? What if I don’t even know what I’m saying? What if I never live out the advice that I give?
These thoughts cloud my mind when I try to write each day.
What if I’m not good enough? What if my vision for my writing gets in the way of what I should be saying?
I know I shouldn’t think these things. Because I know that I need to be doing this. God has called me to do this. To lean on him for strength when my words are not enough. (Because they won’t be. My life is lived in His strength.)
However, I don’t want to just find a Bible verse and pick it apart. I don’t want to just pick a topic and talk on and on for 800 words about it.
I want to speak God’s words. I want to rely on Him for my words to come, and not just force them out through my fingertips.
Sometimes, it is disappointing, because the words don’t come. God speaks to me, and I know that. But when I try to share it, I lose it. (Maybe that’s just me. Or maybe it is a good thing, to keep me from speaking idle words.)
I can’t speak idle words. Idle words – words without the love of God behind them – are clanging cymbals. Annoying and useless for hearing anything.
1 Corinthians 13:1-8 says,
“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.”
Without love – that is, God’s love behind everything we do – nothing matters. It doesn’t matter if I donate $10,000 to an orphanage in Africa. It doesn’t matter if I have a huge amount of faith to accomplish whatever I want. It doesn’t matter if I’m the “godly girl.” It doesn’t matter if I can prophesy, or speak in tongues, or whatever. Without God’s love, everything is useless.
If I write eloquent words while blogging and speak to thousands of people, but have not love, it is all worth nothing.
Love should drive the entirety of our lives. Not just Sunday. Not just at church, or at Bible study, or in a specific place.
Whether I write or whether I don’t, my life should reflect the love of God in every single thing I do.
When I feel wordless, it is okay.
It is better to speak ten words out of love than to speak ten thousand idle words.
I want my life to be rooted in and stemming from the love of God, not out of self-motivation or selfish desires.
I want God’s love to drive my writing, and His will to flow through me.
I want to do away with idle words and only write what He has for me to say.
I want to speak love.
*aj
Scattered Journal Pages 
Great post again Amanda Thank you. If we don’t have love we are nothing. If gave all my money to something because I wanted to look good it would not be out of love.
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Exactly, Nathan. Thank you.
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Wow. Such a good reminder, especially for us bloggers. Thanks!
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Thank you, Cassie!!
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Hi Amanda! I really like your blog and what you have to say 🙂 I completely agree with you about love. Just wanting to question you on your picture for this post though?
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Hi Kate! Thank you for your kind words and commenting on my blog! Haha, the picture. I really didn’t give it too much thought. I found it on a stock image website and liked the image it created in my mind (namely, feathers blowing in the wind, alluding to idle words floating in the breeze, not accomplishing anything). I hoped that people wouldn’t associate it with voodoo or anything, but I put it up anyway. *shrugs* Why do you ask?
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Dear Amanda,
I just wanted to share with you Laundry day last week.
I read your post and what came to my heart was ” Be of Good Cheer”
Sure right? Then our convoluted dryer Bill Gates probably designed ha… malfunctioned.
However He was shouting out to me well…. ” Be of Good Cheer”
And ta da it dawned on me. How did that get there ? that thought ? that feeling? Well He put it there~!
And now I get it …. He was always asking questions in scripture…. and it is because He wants to know if we have the answers … written in our Hearts right? Well I have found more uplifting words since our disastrous laundry day to share for future combat…. however I am so so happy that it works…. you know when you read His word and the Spirit plants it in your heart …. it is a keeper!
And this is why when you write of His word and share it with all of us … we have a chance to perhaps God willing have that message from Him to be planted in our hearts. It is not useless chatter… it is fuel for the soul… and helps us do our chores and yes even love others sometimes we are not so pleased with…. without His word … we cant really share in His love. We can’t do it His way … if we don’t know what He is telling us to do. That is where you come along to help.
I Thank God for you and hope you know that this gift of His word is so much easier than carrying around Moses big tablet around doing laundry and boring chores and winging it on our own strength. . When His word is in our hearts we really can survive…. He has Overcome…. everything. Ha even Laundry day…. silly I don’t think I will ever do the family laundry again the same way…. I will probably bust out laughing … Be of Good Cheer. it was in my heart all along … now I even know where it is John: 16:33
People will always need food and things in the world right? We pray and try to help.
His word that you are sharing however is the greatest Love and Hope of all.
Thank you again. He really Has Overcome… : )
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Yes! I’m so glad that the Holy Spirit plants words in our hearts as well. 🙂 Thanks for commenting!
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I totally get what you mean 🙂
I guess sometimes we get so caught up in trying to get more followers or simply reaching more people, or words become hollow and without meaning.
Sometimes I get myself down by thinking that God’s not speaking simply because I’m not searching hard enough for the message he’s trying to tell me. But at the end of the day, he loves us, and he has a bigger plan for us. Always. So whenever we’re unsure about a decision, unsure about a task, as long as we do it out of love, and for His glory, He will be pleased.
Thanks so much for sharing such an inspiring message!
P.S. Have you ever heard of the song ‘The Proof of your love’ by for King & Country? It sings exactly what this message says.
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Exactly! 😉 I’m so glad you got my message. I agree. And yes, I love that song! I actually
thought of it when I was writing it, haha!
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WordPress suggested this at the bottom of the post I just commented on and…woah. This line: “Sometimes, it is disappointing, because the words don’t come. God speaks to me, and I know that. But when I try to share it, I lose it.” — You mean it’s not just me?! Again? Huh.
Maybe some things God just meant for us.
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(I haven’t thought about this post in forever! Haha.)
We are so much alike. That’s funny. 😉
And maybe that’s a writer’s problem? I’ve read through some of my old posts, and I’ve found I don’t like them or I don’t biblically agree with what I had to say, because I was forcing my words. It’s annoying.
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