Gender Roles in Marriage

Gender Roles in Marriage 

I know, I promised two more posts on feminism and gender roles. Here’s part 2 of 3.

In my last post, I talked about the dangers of our culture embracing feminism. I explained that our views of gender roles are distorted by the culture. When we are urged to make equality about sameness, we muddy the line between men and women.

I talked about us having different roles, because that’s how God designed it. Not because Amanda at Scattered Journal Pages said so, but because God did. And if the Creator of the Universe says something, well, you can’t exactly argue with that.

Ephesians 5 talks a lot about husbands loving their wives, and wives showing respect to their husbands.

While it’s quite long to post on my blog, here’s a link to where you can read it.

I’ve pulled out a verse that specifically stands out to me here, because I think that it’s important when establishing biblical roles of manhood and womanhood (and more specifically, husbandhood and wifehood, hehe).

Ephesians 5:33

“However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”

Want a little more elaboration on the ‘husband love your wife,’ part?

Ephesians 5:25-27

“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.”

And on the ‘wife respect your husband’ part, too.

Ephesians 5:23-24

“For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.”

Now, nobody freak out, okay? This isn’t me trying to say, “ALL YOU WOMEN! GET ON YOUR KNEES AND SERVE YOUR HUSBAND LIKE YOU’RE HIS SLAVE.” That’s absolutely ridiculous, okay?

The wife submits to and respects him. The husband loves her and sacrifices himself for her. It’s simple, really.

Galatians 3:18-19

“Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.”

This is a mutual commitment. It’s equal serving to one another. Neither spouse is taken advantage of this way, nor is it unfair.

Y’all, I know that a lot of us are young and/or single. I get it. I am too. But this doesn’t mean we can disregard what the Bible says on this matter.

I’m going to do the thing where I quote myself, okay? This is what I said in my last post.

“[W]hat I am saying is that when we forget the distinction between genders, and implant feminism into the way we think, we have a chance of crossing the lines of biblical femininity and masculinity. We discredit our self-worth and ascribe it to what we accomplish or prove.

I’m not saying men are better than women. We are absolutely 100% equal. However, we cannot make our roles identical, for to do so would be to discredit the uniqueness of each gender and therefore God’s design.”

As men and women of God, we can’t forget who we are.

I’ll talk about this more on Saturday wherein I attempt to discuss what it looks like to live biblically as a single. (I can’t promise anything there, so here, you are warned.)


4 Replies to “Gender Roles in Marriage”

  1. If Biblical Manhood is about ‘husbandhood’ then Paul was never a Biblical Man. He even wrote that he preferred singleness because that meant he could devote all of his time and resources to serving God without the distractions of married life (1 Corinthians 7). The ancient world had a lot of issues with marriage. Marriage was most commonly a business arrangement between two families – marrying for love was unheard of. Women were usually barely older than thirteen when they were married to men who were usually twenty-three or so. At that time, monogamy was gaining popularity, but there were still situations where one man would be married to multiple wives or might have a concubine on the side – it’s biblical, after all. The Pharisees actually taught that if a woman was childless for ten years, it was permissible to divorce her to marry another wife. It just goes to show to them, her role was to bear sons to inherit the name and property. Which was why Paul’s words was a ground-breaking revelation – telling the men that women are more precious, more worthy, and ought to be shown more respect. Paul had changed their role – from property to partner, from silence to speaking, from second-class status to equal. Likewise, the role of men was also changed, from owner to partner, from silencer to listener, from first-class status to equal. The question is: Did Paul mean that the equality achieved in Iron Age standards was meant to apply for all time, or did it set off a domino chain of events to continue achieving equality into the Information Age?


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