Approaching Gender Biblically – Conclusion

Approaching Gender Biblically - Conclusion

This is part 3 of 3 in my miniseries on the Christian view on gender roles, feminism, and things like that. Thanks for sticking with me!

See part 1 here.

See part 2 here.

On Tuesday, I promised to talk about what gender roles look like as a single, because my post was what gender roles should look like in marriage. And obviously I’m not married, as a lot of us here are not. As much as that’s sort of helpful for the future, I’d like to attempt at tackling the question: “What should I do now?”

That, my friend, is a tough question.

But I’ve been doing some research, talking to my parents and friends, and reading, reading, reading. And I think that I’ve come up with somewhat of a coherent post. Please forgive me if I step on any toes, that’s truly not my intention. As the tagline on my site says, “One Christian Teen Girl’s Contemplations,” that’s what these are.

In the first post of these three, I talked about feminism. More specifically, I should say, I’m talking about equality feminism. Feminism that says women and men should strive to have the exact same roles in every aspect of life.

However, as review, what I said in my post is this.

Men and women are absolutely equal. We have equal standing before God. We are all, every one of us, worth the same. We’re all sinners in need of a Savior, and we’re all created by God’s handiwork.

So when we Christians (as women especially) fight for sameness in the name of equality, we discredit God’s design.

There’s a verse in Galatians that many Christians use to support the whole feminism-sameness thing. They say, “It doesn’t matter what your gender is! Define yourself however you’d like!”

Galatians 3:28

“There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”

Okay, that would be a fair argument if that’s what the verse were saying. However, if you read the chapter, you’ll notice that this isn’t talking about discrediting gender. It’s talking about us all being equal before God. We are all children of God because of what He’s done for us.

With that out of the way, I’d like to approach what the whole point of this post is supposed to be.

Living biblically as a single. (Or, as anyone, really.)

What does it look like?

Anyone remember Mary and Martha? In Luke 10:38-42, Jesus came into a village. Two sisters, Mary and Martha were in that village. While Martha’s busy, working really hard, Mary is getting to know Jesus and listening to Him. Jesus says to Martha, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.” (v. 42)

See, we needn’t try to prove our worth. We don’t need to try to find our satisfaction in work, or equality (however we try to define that), or whatever. Jesus Christ is the only thing that will satisfy us. A personal relationship with Him – not work, not feminism, not even marriage – is what will fill that hole in our hearts.

When we look to be equal all around (meaning the same in every aspect), we aren’t truly satisfied in who God is and who He has made us to be. We don’t view Him as the ultimate authority in our lives. We want to dictate who we are, what our roles are, and what our gender is.

As Christians, we can’t do that.

C.S. Lewis said, “God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing.”

We must remember the basis for our identity. Who we are is found in Him alone. Our relationship with Him is what will satisfy us.

God has created us with equal value (Genesis 1:27). At the same time, in Genesis 2, we see that God creates woman from man. Naturally, that makes us different. There is a defining line between the genders.

We shouldn’t try to fight that line. God is the one that knows best.

So what do we need to do?

Accept our standing before God – that is where our identity is found.

 

Don’t try to prove ourselves. Among men and women, neither is ‘better’ than the other. We were made in the image of God. Our roles are truly enough.

 

Take a stand against the feminist movement that tells God that we know better.

 

And above all else, get to know God and find our ultimate satisfaction in Him. We honestly won’t find it anywhere else.

This post is in no way comprehensive. I hope you’ll look into this topic for yourself (as I will) to understand it even more. Thank you all for reading!

*aj

I’m Just Contemplating The World, Among Other Things.

I’m Just Contemplating The World, Among Other Things.

I don’t know what you’d call me. A thinker, perhaps. I think about things on a really big scale sometimes and people look at me like I’m weird when I make analytical and philosophical comments.

Nothing new there.

Anyway…I’m that weird friend that likes to talk about why things are the way they are. The meaning of life, the measure of success…all that jazz.

But I rarely stop there.

When I think, my life gets put into perspective.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about religion.

Usually, “religious” people have a normal life. School. Work. Play. Family. And on top of that, church and spiritual things once a week or so.

But that bothers me. If our lives are so-called “religious,” why isn’t it integrated into our lives?

That’s a question that has been weighing on me lately, as you probably read in my post about Church Camp Christians.

Honestly, though, my thoughts have been going even deeper than that.

These philosophical contemplations hit me at random times.

I few weeks ago, I was sitting around in my own little head (like I do most days), and thinking.

Why is Jesus the only way?

 

Why do I really live the way I do?

 

Why does God deserve my worship?

 

Could I just pick some other religion if I wanted to?

 

Why?

 

And I mean, I do know the answers to those questions.

I realize that I don’t have too much of a choice. This is God’s universe. He created it. He has existed forever and ever.

Now, when I say that I don’t have much of a choice, please don’t take it the wrong way.

It’s just like this.

I either choose to love God and be saved by Him, or I don’t.

I choose His way, or I choose mine.

At first, this might seem unfair. Who put God in charge?

Well, that’s the thing. This is HIS universe. He didn’t have to create us, but He did anyway. He knew we’d rebel against Him, but He created us and loved us anyway. He knew that we would rebel and therefore break our relationship with Him, but He still sent Jesus for us. He still forgives our sin because of His grace. And He deserves our worship because He is God. It’s not really explainable.

God has always existed, and always will exist. Earth is just a smudge in all of eternity.

So, why is Jesus the only way? Well, if there was another way to God, one that was easier, then why would Jesus have come in the first place?

Simple. He wouldn’t’ve. There’s no point in an unnecessary sacrifice.

When I look at the world, my thoughts are provoked.

When I see people walking in the streets. When I see people in stores. When I see people writing books or making movies.

What are they living for?

 

Do they realize that we are made for more than just going through boring old life?

 

Do they realize that God is at the center of the universe? That He is in control? That He wants to have a personal relationship with them, no matter how far gone they are?

 

Do they realize that they’ll never be satisfied until they get to know God for who He is?

 

Just a simple shift in perspective makes me realize that it’s not about me.

It’s not about how good I am, but about how good God is. He loved me, and gave Himself for me.

I don’t live out of guilt, obligation, or drudgery.

I live because I don’t deserve grace. I don’t deserve love. I don’t deserve hope.

And yet, I have been given it. It’s beautiful, really. Inspiring.

If you consider Christianity a religion, then I want my religion to bleed into my everyday life.

No, actually, I want it to take over.

I want my relationship with Jesus to be the thing that I live for. The thing that makes my heart beat. The thing that inspires me.

And you know what?

It sure does.

*aj

An Open Letter To You!

An Open Letter To You!

This little blogger-writer over here had a grand old idea in February to name her blog Scattered Journal Pages.

And, um, there haven’t been too many of those. I feel as though this lovely little blog is more of a…

You know what, I have no idea. It’s one part website, one part hangout spot, one part Bible study inside my head, one part splotched and weathered journal page, and one part bookshelf. It’s a lot of fun, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

However, it’s called Scattered Journal Pages for a reason, and I’d like to share something that perhaps is remotely journal-related.

You know, something I would write on notebook paper.

A letter maybe.

How about that today. I love letters.

*sharpens pencil* *pulls out fresh sheet of paper*

Dear Person Reading This (yes, I am talking to YOU, the lovely person that’s reading this right now),

Hello. I’m Amanda. You may be my good friend, or you may have never even heard of me.

Maybe I know you, maybe I don’t.

But that’s not really the point here. The point is that YOU are reading MY blog, and this letter is addressed most definitely to you.

And no matter who you are, I’d like you to stick around so I can tell you a few REALLY important things. Because we all need to hear them.

Dear One, you are loved.

You are loved ever so much by your AMAZING Creator, and He wants to have a personal relationship with you. Yes, you. Not just your cousin, aunt, spouse, neighbor, or friend, but YOU.

You wanna know why? Because God is gracious, and love has nothing to do with anything you’ve ever done. Jesus died so that your sins would be forgiven, and He rose again to prove it.

This is real love–not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins. (1 John 4:10, NLT, emphasis mine.)

Lovely Person, no matter where you are in life, you are absolutely never too far gone.

It is always an option to come to God for forgiveness. And once we have accepted forgiveness, we are counted righteous and blameless.

Come to your Heavenly Father. His grace is for you.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9)

Dear Reader, God has a plan for you.

He knows what He’s doing. He’s in control of your life, and all things are going to work together for the good of those who love Him. If you love Him, that’s you. Your future is bright, even if you’re ninety-three.

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28)

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. (Jeremiah 29:11-13)

My Friend, I know that it’s not popular to think this way, but it’s imperative that you know that Jesus is the ONLY way to God.

Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. (John 14:6)

And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved. (Acts 4:12)

And lastly, Wonderful Listener (seriously, if you’re still here, you get a sticker), don’t be afraid.

 

God is always with you, no matter what you’re facing. I don’t know exactly what you’re going through, but whatever it may be, you don’t need to be afraid. God will give you strength and He will help you.

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. (Isaiah 41:10)

Friend, God is for you and not against you. He loves you more than you can fathom. Don’t reject that, but receive it.

Sincerely, Me.

*aj

Knowledge and Belief: From The Head To The Heart

Waves in Ocean

My head knows, but my heart doesn’t always accept it.

Yes, oh yes, that’s how a lot of my life goes.

I know the truth. I know it.

But sometimes, I have a hard time believing.

There’s a saying that goes something like, “The eighteen inches between the head and the heart are the most dangerous eighteen inches in the world.”

Or something.

The point being, it’s not enough to just know something. It’s imperative that it’s also believed.

See, in my head, I know that God is good. Great, in fact. I know that He has great plans for me, and that He will never leave me or forsake me, and that I’m never alone, and that He has everything under control, and that I don’t need to worry.

I know all this. I really do.

But do I actually believe it?

Now here, I’m not trying to second-guess myself or anything like that. I’m not trying to “prove” that I believe and not just know, or “try to be better,” or whatever.

But it’s definitely more reassuring when I can believe something and not just know it.

For example, I can spout out facts all day long about how strong a trapeze is, and how there’s a totally-safe net under it, and how I have a tight harness, and how 105% secure I am on that trapeze. But it’s not very reassuring if I’m asked to get up there and don’t believe that I’m actually safe.

Right?

Because unless I believe something in my heart, pure and raw knowledge alone won’t get me to trust God with my life.

See, I know that God is good. Like I said. Like it says in the Bible. I know that He will take care of me, and I don’t need to worry.

But when the pressure turns on, and I have to trust God and trust Him alone, it’s hard. It’s hard to bring what I know in my head to be what I believe in my heart.

And every day I have a choice.

Because hard things happen, and life breaks us, and tears jump out of our eyes, and Satan stabs away our joy, we have a choice.

Do we jump on the trapeze in surrender and trust, or shrink back and spout out facts that we’ll never put into practice?

I’m going with the former.

I heard another quote, and it’s like this.

“Surrendering to God isn’t losing or giving up. It’s winning, because once we surrender to God, we have transferred to the ‘right’ side and we have already won.”

God has fought for our souls, and we have proof that He is good.

The Cross has proven to us that the love of God is great enough for us, that the grace of God is enough to carry us through it all, that the forgiveness of God is enough to change us from the inside out, that the peace of God is great enough to comfort us in terrible times of despair, and that the mercy of God was made manifest in the torture of His own Son – because of His compassionate and loving heart.

Doubts will creep in, and waves will crash down on me, and despair will plague me, and there will be times when I question if God is really enough. Times will come when I can’t see God past the cloud of worldliness. There are going to be days when I can’t feel the goodness of God, and it feels like Satan is winning.

But when I look at the Cross, it is the most powerful thing. The Cross is greater than all my doubts, insecurities, faithlessness, and hopelessness, for death itself has been defeated by what Jesus has done on the Cross for me.

The step of getting what I know from my head to my heart is a mere eighteen inches, albeit a very important eighteen inches.

The Cross is where knowledge turns to belief. There is proof.

Romans 5:8

But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

God loved us from the very beginning, but He proved it by sending His Son to save us.

Once we accept the Cross, there is a bridge between the head and the heart.

I pray that we would all accept the bridge, for it’s never worth it to live in unbelief!

*aj

I’m A Christian, And Also An Introvert

Woman, Mountain

As you all probably know…I’m an introvert.

INFJ, to be exact, which just so happens to be the rarest personality type in the world.

As an introvert, I enjoy solitude, find my best friendships one-on-one (as opposed to in a group setting), and I feel most comfortable at home. Preferably with a book, cup of tea or coffee, and gentle music in my earbuds.

All bookishness aside (though I would gladly talk about my love for books for hours), it’s part of my personality that I’m not very much of a social butterfly. I love people…one-on-one.

I find that a lot of times I lose myself in a group and find myself off to the side. I’d much rather converse with one friend than contribute to a group conversation in which we talk about pointless things.

That’s just who I am, and I’m still trying to accept the fact that 90% of my friends are extroverts and introverts understand me so much more. But it’s okay.

See, as humans, we all are different. Very different in fact. There’s not a right or a wrong personality, just like it’s not right to be a bus driver and wrong to be a waiter. Everyone has different gifts, and they’re all really important, especially as Christians.

God made us all with a purpose and a plan!

Psalm 139:14

I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

For me, that’s a relief, because a lot of times, I feel like there must be something wrong with me. Social situations can be quite awkward, even if I know exactly what’s going on. Why don’t I just connect with friendly people my age?

Although I can’t really answer that, because I don’t really know, I do know that I have a purpose.

1 Corinthians 12:14-18

For the body does not consist of one member but of many. If the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to the body,” that would not make it any less a part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would be the sense of hearing? If the whole body were an ear, where would be the sense of smell? But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them, as he chose.

I’ve come to understand that there’s nothing really wrong with me. I’m a rare introvert, and while I wish I had closer friendships, God has made me to be me. And I have a purpose in an extroverted world…even when it seems as though I’m a circular puzzle piece in a square-jigsaw-puzzle of a world.

As a Christian, I’m realizing that while having a unique personality is all well and good, it’s really important what we do with it.

Do I keep quiet about my faith in compromising situations because I’m “not comfortable” with speaking up and obeying my convictions?

Do I ignore the New Kid because I feel like introducing myself will be awkward?

Do I refuse to serve at church in a position that’s out of my comfort zone?

Do I ignore the Holy Spirit’s prompting to share the Gospel because “it doesn’t feel right”?

This is where, as a member of the Body of Christ, I can get in trouble.

Because God doesn’t call us specifically to comfort.

Oh yes, He uses us right where we are. In fact, I don’t know if I’d be blogging if I spoke all these words instead of writing them.

But if God calls us to do something, we are wrong to refuse it because it’s “not our thing”.

We are all different, but we are all called to be salt and light in a dark world, and to share the Gospel.

It’s never easy, and it’s something that I think we all need to work on.

So, I’m going to take advantage of who God has made me to be. Places like this blog give me the opportunity to share my faith. Having close friendships help me to have meaningful discussions about important matters. Solitude helps me to get to know who God is more and more. When it’s quiet, and I feel alone, I remember that God is always with me and He will never leave.

But also, I’m going to take advantage of the opportunities that God puts in my path to serve Him, and I’m not going to rely on comfort to make decisions for me.

I have decided that I will live my life for my Lord, who has loved me first and saved my soul. It doesn’t matter if befriending someone is awkward; if God is nudging me to do something, I will do it. For living for Him is all that matters. Here and Now will fade away, but God stands for all eternity.

My personality doesn’t get me off the hook for serving God. I have a part to play in this world. I have so many opportunities, both within my comfort zone and outside of it, and I’m not going to give them up.

2 Timothy 1:8-9

Therefore do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord, nor of me his prisoner, but share in suffering for the gospel by the power of God, who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works but because of his own purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began[.]

We have a holy calling. Isn’t that amazing? Let’s follow after God in what He is calling us to do, both in what comes easy, and what we have to rely on God’s strength for.

It’s not about us, it’s about Him.

Yes, I’m still an introvert. But yes, I am still a Christian. I have a different personality than most people, and I have a place in the Body of Christ. But I’m not limited…for God has plans for me, bigger than I could dream of. And I desire to be used by God.

*aj

It’s A [Crazy] Wonderful Life

Plans.

Sometimes, I have a bunch of crazy dreams and aspirations.

Let me rephrase that.

Always, every day, I have new and insane plans and aspirations.

I’m a dreamer. I want to see things happen. I’m a little crazy. Or a lotta crazy.

I want to do so much.

When I was young, people would ask me, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” And I would always answer with a shy shrug, and reply with, “I don’t know. I want to be a mommy and I can’t figure out anything else.”

Now, I’m almost exactly the opposite.

“So, what are you planning on doing with your life?”

“That’s a great question. I’d like to get a degree in English, so that I can write, proofread, and edit, but perhaps I’d like to get a job at a publishing company, or start my own.

“Music has always been a part of me, so there’s always that. And acting and filmmaking has always captured my interest. I’d love to make a movie, and be in one. Or two. Or three. Or more.

“I’d also like to be a wife and momma, adopt some kids if God allows, and homeschool ‘em all.

“I really wanted to go to the Olympics for gymnastics when I was ten, but I didn’t go far enough with it.

“Or perhaps I’d like to be involved in vocational ministry. A youth speaker. And maybe I want to just be an author, write a dozen books, and go that route.

“I’d like to travel the world, learn another language (or get better at Spanish) and go on some short-term missions trips to South America.”

This is making me really upset right now. Right this moment, yes, though I’m talking about in general.

And rightfully so, I think.

Because I don’t have my life figured out. If it were up to me, I’d be married by twenty-two, with a novel-worthy love story, living in a little apartment, with everything painted white. I’d have a job during the day that I was in love with, and I would write books and blog posts in the evenings and early mornings.

Then, at twenty-five, I’d have a few kids. I’d stay home and homeschool them, and work part-time if I could.

But I’m crazy.

For all I know, I could be single until I’m thirty. I could have a job that I don’t like, and have never written any books. I could still have my teeny and messy beach-themed bedroom at my parents’ house until I marry.

I could still have this little corner of the internet called a blog and ramble about my life on Tuesdays and Saturdays.

I really don’t know, and that upsets me sometimes.

I don’t have all the answers.

Life is crazy and overwhelming.

I have so much more life to live, and I want to do it all right now.

And I can’t. I’m fifteen. I can’t drive, or marry right now, or get a full-time job, or raise children, or live on my own, or anything like that.

*sighs*

It’s a waiting game.

So I’m trying my best to learn a little lesson here.

God’s ways are not my ways, and His thoughts aren’t my thoughts.

His plans are the best ones for me. Not mine. His.

I don’t know what life will bring, but I do know this. God is in control. He has my life laid out, and knows exactly what will happen.

He knows who I’m going to marry. What I’m going to “be when I grow up”.

He knows my thoughts. He knows me, because He is my Creator.

He loves my soul, and has only the best in mind for me.

He wants me to rely on Him because He knows I can’t do life on my own.

And like I was saying a minute ago, I get really upset by this sometimes. I feel like crying…a lot. But actually, I think that’s a good thing.

It’s so important to see that we can’t accomplish life’s craziness on our own. It’s okay to cry…because life is insane, and stressful, and overwhelming, and difficult. And I’m mortal, and naïve, and stupid sometimes, and inexperienced, and impatient, and messy.

But the God who is immortal, and all-knowing, and possesses all wisdom, and is patient and created life itself knows me.

He knows me.

And He loves me.

Through my weakness, and flaws, and broken humanity, I am treasured, and held in the palm of the hand of the One who is control of it all.

 

I am His child.

I have crazy plans, and a crazy life, and I get overwhelmed easily. I don’t know what I’m going to do with my life, or how I’m going to handle hardships.

But I’m not in control, and I can’t pretend that I am.

My life belongs to God. I’m never going to be qualified to handle life on my own.

But I’m a daughter of the One who hold my life.

Here and now, I submit my life to the one that treasures it. I relinquish my plans to the Lover of my soul. I surrender my dreams to the One that gave them to me in the first place. I give up my control to the Author of space and time; the One who holds it all.

I rest in the embrace of the One who pens my story.

He has figured out my life for me…and I will never EVER be alone.

Proverbs 16:9

The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.

Jeremiah 29:11

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

Proverbs 16:3

Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.

Isaiah 55:9

For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Proverbs 19:21

Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.

Romans 8:28

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

Joshua 1:9

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.

Job 12:10

In his hand is the life of every living thing and the breath of all mankind.

*aj

A Letter to the Younger Me

Notebook Letter Writing

Lately, I’ve been all over open letters online. I’ve been loving the Dear Future Husband letter thing, letters to Your Future Self, etc. But I decided to take a slightly different path and write a letter to the Younger Me. Basically, I wish I had known these things when I was ten, eleven, twelve, and on. I’ve learned so many little tings in the past few years – and I think it’s important that I share them. So here we are now. A Letter to the Younger Me.

Dear Younger Amanda,

There are some things I wish I could have told you when you were younger, in the midst of life, trying to figure everything out.

Perhaps you would have turned out to be a different person than you are today. But no matter. You’ve lived a short fifteen years at this point in time, and you’ve already learned a lot.

First of all, I want you to know that life is going to be hard. Things are going to happen that will test you. Your heart will get broken no matter where you are in life – by people and all kinds of crazy circumstances. It’s not going to be easy by any stretch, but God will be with you through it all. Trust me on this. You will never ever be alone.

Besides not being alone, you should know something else. Sometimes, life will be really dark. You might feel hopeless, or lost, or drowning. But darling, always remember that the sun will rise, however long the night. You’ll get through whatever happens, because you will not be alone. There is hope, and you must not ever give up.

Dear Younger Amanda, having a lot of friends doesn’t mean much. Being popular doesn’t matter. It’s really okay if you’re not “in” with the “cool kids”. It’s much more important to focus on being a good friend to others and getting to know a few people well. It’s the quality of friends that matter; not the quantity. And you can work on being a quality friend.

Dear Darling, I want you to know that drama really doesn’t matter. It won’t matter who-likes-who in a few years. Don’t even get your heart all tangled up with crushes and drama and silly young-teenage girl things that don’t matter. Your heart is WAY too precious to throw around like a bowling ball. It’s worth it to focus on more important things than relationships at such a young age; don’t worry about marriage. You’ve got plenty of time.

Younger Me, figure out things you love and work on cultivating those things. Don’t be afraid to try new things, make mistakes, and brush yourself off from those embarrassing little mishaps. And keep on trying. God has given you passions for a reason. Don’t give up on things you don’t think you have talent in. (And here’s a hint: in the future, you are going to love to read novels and write like crazy. Don’t give up just because you think you’re not good at it!)

Dear Girl, find people to look up to and get to know them. Amazing people will come into your life, and you’ll feel like the luckiest girl alive. You probably will be. Listen to people older and wiser than you, and learn from them. You are going to be blessed greatly and learn a lot. Don’t forget to thank those people.

Dear Amanda, hard things are going to happen, but look at the big picture. Don’t fret so much. Everything happens for a reason, and you don’t need to worry so much. You’re young and free now; enjoy it.

Even when you feel like you know better, trust your parents. Remember that they were once your age, and they really do know better than you. Amanda, make sure to cultivate a relationship with them. Trust them. Listen. Take advice. And know that they understand the Bible really well, and you can always talk to them.

Dear Younger Me, the most important thing I will tell you is this: READ YOUR BIBLE. You will be thirteen when you really start reading your Bible regularly, and your life will change after that. It’s going to be an amazing ride, so hold on tight, and follow God wherever He leads. It’s crazy, awesome, and totally worth it. And by strengthening your relationship with God by reading your Bible every day (or as best you can) and praying, you will grow so much.

Love,

Your Slightly Older Self

*aj

The Loneliness Cure

Lonely Girl

It’s real.

Loneliness.

Loneliness is ever so real, and oh, have I felt it.

Sometimes I try to escape the feeling of loneliness by distracting myself. Listening to music, reading a book, texting a friend. Though it may make me “cheer up,” for a moment, I just go back to feeling alone.

It hurts. Trust me.

When my friends leave, when I don’t talk to someone for eight months, when I haven’t seen my best friend in so long, when I haven’t cried with anyone since who-knows-when, when I haven’t been able to pour my heart out to someone at my level – that’s when it hits.

I would not call it depression; I would simply put it as devastating lonely disappointment. The more I dwell on how imperfect I and everyone else is, the more I see the flaws in every aspect of life. And the more I dwell on flaws (mine include), the more I feel sorry for myself.

I feel sorry that people haven’t texted me, or that I wasn’t invited to so-and-so’s house the other night, or that my old friends aren’t my closest friends anymore. I feel sorry for myself because ultimately, life is not perfect. And I can’t expect it to be.

It hurts me to dwell on “how few” friends I have. That is, friends that I am free to share my heart with; friends that I trust; friends that will talk to me out-of-the-blue, because they just really do care. (Um, yes, this probably sounds pathetic and over-dramatized. I do have a lot of friends, it’s just hard to consider *all* my friends to be my closest friends.)

But I’ve realized something really important.

No matter the number of friends I have, no matter the quality of friends I have, no matter what I’m given in life, I’m still going to be lonely.

That is, if I rely on people. We’ve already established that people are imperfect, and this world is flawed. Therefore, it stands to reason, that there is no way that friends alone can cure my loneliness.

But Someone else can.

That amazing Someone is God, who created us to love Him and crave His love. And by His amazing Word, I know that He is the only one that can cure me.

Isaiah 41:10

“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

 

Deuteronomy 31:6

“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”

 

Psalm 38:9-11; 15

“O Lord, all my longing is before you;

    my sighing is not hidden from you.

My heart throbs; my strength fails me,

    and the light of my eyes—it also has gone from me.

My friends and companions stand aloof from my plague,

    and my nearest kin stand far off.

[…]

But for you, O Lord, do I wait;

    it is you, O Lord my God, who will answer.”

 

Joshua 1:5

“No man shall be able to stand before you all the days of your life. Just as I was with Moses, so I will be with you. I will not leave you or forsake you.”

 

Psalm 34:17-18

“When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”

 

Psalm 9:9

“The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.”

 

Isaiah 26:3

You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.”

 

See, the Lord God Almighty (and all-merciful) is the One who our hearts long for. My heart longs to be filled with His love, and His peace, and His strength, and His saving, and His steady grace to fill me where I cannot fill myself. It’s so amazing to have this to lean on!

So whenever I am wallowing in my loneliness, I make myself remember. I remember how much God loves me. I remember how much grace He gives me. I remember how He will never leave me. I remember how He’s saved me. I remember that He’s on my side. I remember how He gives me courage to face anything, because He is here with me. I remember that He is my friend who will never fail me. I remember that He restores my soul.

And no matter what, He will uphold me. No matter what I’m going through, He will be here with me.

And in comparison to my loneliness – this horrible beast that wants to ruin me – it has absolutely NOTHING on the God who bought my life with His own.

Loneliness can be cured. But not by a phone call, or a friendship, or a trinket, or a pep talk.

My loneliness can only be cured by the love that comes from my Father in Heaven, who loved me, and gave himself for me.

When I’m feeling alone – I am not alone. I have the God of Angel Armies on my side, and no one can stand against. Praise the Lord!

*aj