Enough: my battle with the hustle, the stress, and the busy, and how I found rest

Enough.jpg

It’s Saturday morning.

 

Rainy and chilly, I tiptoe across the living room carpet, coffee in hand, hair thrown haphazardly into a messy bun. I breathe.

 

After a week of running fast and hard, it’s finally quiet. No more hustle. Just me. It’s a refreshing change of pace, but I find my mind spinning with thoughts to make up for the lack of stimulation in tasks, math problems, and meals to cook.

 

I think about how much I absolutely adore New York City. I love the noise, the lights, the crowds, the pace. I’m enamored with the culture, the resilience, the opportunities.

 

But maybe, sometimes, I identify with it a little too much? I fill my life with faster, louder, more, more, more. I say YES and tack more onto my to-do list, put more friends and meetings on my calendar, apply to serve in my church more and more and more and more – and then I collapse. Hard.

 

Because I tell myself I can’t rest, I shouldn’t take the time to be refreshed. And it’s not as though I don’t rest – just that often, those times are laden with feelings of guilt.

 

Because don’t I need to do more? Be more? Write more? Work more? Study more? Sing more? Don’t I need to prove that I can be independent, capable, and strong? That I can meet people’s expectations?

 

Don’t I need to prove that I’m enough? Continue reading “Enough: my battle with the hustle, the stress, and the busy, and how I found rest”

When We Feel Unworthy of Being Loved

When We Feel Unworthy of Being Loved

 

Maybe it’s a silly notion. Though I’m sure we’ve all felt it.

 

Unworthy. Undeserving. Afraid of not being enough. Not good enough to be loved.

 

Because deep down, we know we’re not truly “good,” in and of ourselves – and that’s a terrifying thought. But that fear doesn’t have to destroy us.

Continue reading “When We Feel Unworthy of Being Loved”

You Are Not a Failure. I Promise.

You Are Not a Failure. I Promise.

 

I don’t know when exactly the thought enters our minds, but somewhere along the line, it just creeps in.

 

You are a failure.

 

Maybe we’ve overcommitted (I know I have) and been unsuccessful in getting everything done well or on time. Maybe we just didn’t live up to the standards we put on ourselves.

 

Maybe we think the reason why we’re single is that we’re failures; not pretty enough, not charming enough, too awkward or dumb, or just bad at this whole “life on earth” thing.

 

Maybe we’ve flunked multiple tests in a row. Been rejected by those whom we once thought were friends. Made poor decisions that affected more than just our own selves.

 

Maybe we’ve been hurt by others and led to believe that it was our fault. That if we had just [insert action here]-ed, we would not have had to go through our pain.

 

But, my friend, none of those things makes you a failure.

 

You are not a failure; I promise you that. Sure, bad decisions can be made, and things can be done to harm us. But we are not considered failures by the One who saved us.

 

Our failures do not determine our worth, just as our sins do not condemn us now. Why? Because we have been redeemed, and we are loved no matter what.

 

Just as swimming doesn’t make me a fish, eating carrots doesn’t make me a bunny, and growing doesn’t make me a plant, failing does not make me a failure.

 

Because I have been redeemed by Jesus’ blood, my God does not count me as a failure.

 

Sure, I’ll fail. I’ll fail tests, I’ll fail to live up to people’s expectations, I’ll fail to please the people I love, I’ll fail to be perfect, I’ll fail to meet my goals I set for myself.

 

But it’s okay. Because God does not see me as a failure.

 

He sees the righteousness of His Son in me.

 

2 Corinthians 5:21

“For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”

 

He has overwritten my old nature and given me a new one, that my past might not stain me.

 

2 Corinthians 5:17

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.”

 

I am called a Child of God.

 

Romans 8:15

“For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, ‘Abba! Father!’”

 

Maybe you’re tempted to call yourself a “failure” or a “disappointment” or you’re constantly beating yourself up over what you’ve done, and possibly what you’re still doing.

 

But no matter who you are or what you’ve done, God’s grace covers you, no exceptions.

 

It’s okay to drop your labels and just come to Him. Come as you are. Messy pieces and all.

 

And I want you to know that once you have been forgiven, you will never be considered by God to be a failure.

 

No.

 

You are a holy Child of God. You are sacred, you are His. You are cherished. You are considered blameless before Him. Nothing, and I repeat nothing, can take His love away from you.

 

And even when you fail, He does not see you as a failure.

 

*aj

Approaching Gender Biblically – Conclusion

Approaching Gender Biblically - Conclusion

This is part 3 of 3 in my miniseries on the Christian view on gender roles, feminism, and things like that. Thanks for sticking with me!

See part 1 here.

See part 2 here.

On Tuesday, I promised to talk about what gender roles look like as a single, because my post was what gender roles should look like in marriage. And obviously I’m not married, as a lot of us here are not. As much as that’s sort of helpful for the future, I’d like to attempt at tackling the question: “What should I do now?”

That, my friend, is a tough question.

But I’ve been doing some research, talking to my parents and friends, and reading, reading, reading. And I think that I’ve come up with somewhat of a coherent post. Please forgive me if I step on any toes, that’s truly not my intention. As the tagline on my site says, “One Christian Teen Girl’s Contemplations,” that’s what these are.

In the first post of these three, I talked about feminism. More specifically, I should say, I’m talking about equality feminism. Feminism that says women and men should strive to have the exact same roles in every aspect of life.

However, as review, what I said in my post is this.

Men and women are absolutely equal. We have equal standing before God. We are all, every one of us, worth the same. We’re all sinners in need of a Savior, and we’re all created by God’s handiwork.

So when we Christians (as women especially) fight for sameness in the name of equality, we discredit God’s design.

There’s a verse in Galatians that many Christians use to support the whole feminism-sameness thing. They say, “It doesn’t matter what your gender is! Define yourself however you’d like!”

Galatians 3:28

“There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”

Okay, that would be a fair argument if that’s what the verse were saying. However, if you read the chapter, you’ll notice that this isn’t talking about discrediting gender. It’s talking about us all being equal before God. We are all children of God because of what He’s done for us.

With that out of the way, I’d like to approach what the whole point of this post is supposed to be.

Living biblically as a single. (Or, as anyone, really.)

What does it look like?

Anyone remember Mary and Martha? In Luke 10:38-42, Jesus came into a village. Two sisters, Mary and Martha were in that village. While Martha’s busy, working really hard, Mary is getting to know Jesus and listening to Him. Jesus says to Martha, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.” (v. 42)

See, we needn’t try to prove our worth. We don’t need to try to find our satisfaction in work, or equality (however we try to define that), or whatever. Jesus Christ is the only thing that will satisfy us. A personal relationship with Him – not work, not feminism, not even marriage – is what will fill that hole in our hearts.

When we look to be equal all around (meaning the same in every aspect), we aren’t truly satisfied in who God is and who He has made us to be. We don’t view Him as the ultimate authority in our lives. We want to dictate who we are, what our roles are, and what our gender is.

As Christians, we can’t do that.

C.S. Lewis said, “God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing.”

We must remember the basis for our identity. Who we are is found in Him alone. Our relationship with Him is what will satisfy us.

God has created us with equal value (Genesis 1:27). At the same time, in Genesis 2, we see that God creates woman from man. Naturally, that makes us different. There is a defining line between the genders.

We shouldn’t try to fight that line. God is the one that knows best.

So what do we need to do?

Accept our standing before God – that is where our identity is found.

 

Don’t try to prove ourselves. Among men and women, neither is ‘better’ than the other. We were made in the image of God. Our roles are truly enough.

 

Take a stand against the feminist movement that tells God that we know better.

 

And above all else, get to know God and find our ultimate satisfaction in Him. We honestly won’t find it anywhere else.

This post is in no way comprehensive. I hope you’ll look into this topic for yourself (as I will) to understand it even more. Thank you all for reading!

*aj

%d bloggers like this: